Bind my wandering heart to Thee.
What's really important? That the kids are bathed, clothed, and fed. That my marriage is flourishing. That the toilets are cleaned, again. That there are clean dishes to eat off from. That we go grocery shopping. That we work. That we have family time. That we have devotions.
Yes! These things are ALL important! All essentials to living life properly. So why do I feel like I'm upside-down with my priorities again?! There is a constant juggle in our home of things that must get done: quality time with Jesus and family and then work and chores. It sounds cut and dry when I put it that way and yet, here I am facing this same struggle yet again!
I think it becomes a struggle when I'm not living holistically: having deep conversations while playing, praying while I'm getting things done.... I'm very one-track-minded lately, I do the dishes but my mind is distant from the kids all around me. Devotions are hurried since it's already way past bedtime. The only time for my work is when Jordan and I join each other on the couch at night. I'm having a hard time multi-tasking lately and I think it's because I so fully want to enjoy what time is left of summer before the kids go back but some to-dos are getting neglected. Like deep, quality time with my Savior. And I can feel that that critical 'something' is amiss. If I'm not living holistically each day, I can feel the absence of His presence and it negatively affects me.
I read this from 'Jesus Calling' this morning: 'In this action-addicted world, few of My children take time to sit quietly in My Presence.' God wants us to 'bring [Him] the sacrifice of [our] time.' I guess the keyword that sticks out to me in this phrase is to 'sit quietly'. Not only if we have the extra time, not hurriedly, not in our distracted thoughts. But taking time... to sit... in His Presence. This isn't the only way we can experience His Presence, by sitting, but I think it speaks specifically to me today because when I am standing, I am moving, I am accomplishing. I am doing things that might distract me from seeking God. But if I'm sitting with nothing else in front of me, I am more likely to be able to focus solely on my Maker.
I turned to James 1:5 after reading this: 'If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.' And I discovered what I need: wisdom! It's not rocket science, I realize that! But once again, I need to ask for wisdom on how to prioritize, how to multi-task, how to live in His presence the entire day. And I think it takes some intentional time throughout the day to sit and get a glimpse of His Presence once again.
I thought of the old song, 'Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing'. And along with praying for wisdom, my prayer is that the Holy Spirit would 'bind my wandering heart to Thee'. It's fitting because my mind wanders all day long. I can't be holistic if my mind isn't attuned to Christ. So I hope to bring my heart and mind back to God today, over and over; to carve out time throughout the day to sit and allow His Presence to saturate me; and to then be able to take the Holy Spirit and infuse the rest of my day with evidence of His Presence, living holistically and making every moment, big and small, count.